Withdrawal Is An Ugly, Nasty B!%@#

And it turns me into one.  Luckily my very patient and supportive husband is aware of the forces that are currently at work here.  We remember this from last time - gluten withdrawal.  Since learning of my own sensitivity to gluten and as a result of previous attempts to go gluten-free, I definitely noticed a connection between removing gluten and my mood.  First, I am a total mess going off of it, and second, I am a happier, more energetic person once I get through the withdrawal.  I have actually wondered how much my past struggles with depression might be connected to my consumption of gluten.  If anyone had told me years ago how much different foods we eat can impact so many facets of health, I never would have believed or understood.  Now, after taking out certain foods and observing the changes, I'm a believer.  (It doesn't make it any easier, though.)

I have spent most of this evening in tears.  We found blood in Bug's diaper today.  The tiniest little streaks, but very much there and bringing me right back to the hell of 2 years ago.  How can this be happening again?  I thought we were getting so close to figuring things out.

So with the withdrawal, the discouragement, the tail-end of the nastiest flu I've had in a very long time, and the typical sleep deprivation of motherhood, let's just say I'm not a big ball of fun and happiness right now.